DAY + 6

It has now been six days since Brendan's transplant. He is in the full throws of all the horrible stuff that happens to you in transplant. Brendan spends his days in bed doing very little. He is really suffering from the side effects of chemo and radiation.

He can no longer eat or wants to drink and relies on nutrition through his central line. His mouth, throat and gut are covered in very painful ulcers. He is given strong pain killers to stop the pain of the ulcers. He is suffering from very high fevers that are caused by an infection which have come from his own skin. Brendan relies on us for all his needs. It takes two of us to help shower him as the "space-ship" has to be moved by one person and the other one watches over Brendan. Just walking to the bathroom and back is exhausting for him.

We all get very little sleep. Richard and I take turns to stay overnight with Brendan. The one who does not sleep over, sleeps in our room at Ronnie Mac house. This way we get to sleep every second night. Our days are spent caring for Brendan and the one who has had very little sleep the night before comes and goes as they need to. We try and have dinner together and see Brendan before he settles down for the night.

Brendan is not at all demanding, rather it is his illness that is demanding. The next few weeks will be like this. For now (it is still very early days) he seems to have avoided some of the life threatening side effects of his treatment. He is on an amazing amounts of anti-bacterial, anti-viral and anti-fungal medications. His medications seem to go around the clock. He relies on all his blood products being given to him via his central line as he has no marrow to make any of his own.

Brendan's special spark has gone. He is very flat and very quiet. He is comfortable as long as one of us is around. He doesn't mind us coming and going as long as he knows where we are. He has asked me several times recently why can't his life be "normal". I tell him we are here to make him better so that his life will be "normal". Each day is different and in one day so many things can change. Brendan can be sitting up in bed chatting and the next moment he is fevering and very unwell. All we can do is take everything as it comes.

Will keep you all up to date on Brendan's progress.

Love Anna